Confession

Thursdays are the tauntings of a Friday. Today was no exception. I wanted to sleep so badely this morning too because I had been up late, going to confession, ice cream (with Caroline) and then studying for a Spanish Test (though i doubt it helped haha) Here's confession.

"Matthew, are you going to do it with us?" Caroline. We had picked him up from boyscouts on our way to the church. He shook his head. He was all nerves. I felt bad. I was all nervous myself, I can imagine how he felt.

"Are you sure?" Caroline. He ponders this and then shakes his head yes.
"Okay, sure." I give him a playful punch and 'ya' for him. He offers a small smile. So we wait in line for almost ten minutes and he is reading the little note that tells you all about confessions and what prayer to say. Caroline helps him with some words. Well, I look down and see that he is trying to memorize it. Poor kid.

"Matthew, you don't have to memorize it. The prayer is in there. Don't worry. I am just as nervous as you are." Me. He looks up at me.

"I can bring this in?"

"Yep."

"Oh, ha, good." And then he relaxed slightly. I went second, Caroline going first. Whenever I go to confession I am always so flustered that I nearly forget all my sins, which is not the thing to do when confessing and being cleansed of them. But I tried my best and then Father blessed me and told me to go and pray 5 hail mary's and one glory be. I did much more than that as all the sins I hadn't confessed came pouring back into my mind. And then I started onto a whole list of things for God to help me with and to look after my family. Which led me to thanking God for all that he has given me.

You know when you reach that point and you just start thinking off all the little things that you are oh so thankful for, things you don't even realize you have until you look at your friend three pews away, her head bowed, her hands folded real tight, and then you look behind you at your sister doing the same thing, and you think 'this is what its all about.' Well that's what happened to me. And I just kept thanking God for giving me a great family, and a friend that will never judge me and will always love me, know matter how horrible a person I am, and a place in the world that I didn't realize I possed until I started thanking God for all the people I knew and all the people that I hope to meet and the moral support that I try to offer to each every single day. So then the tears started up and I thought I was going to have a good cry, but then Matthew nudges me and his eyes were so trusting. He was saying his pentance and wanted to know what had happened to Caroline. Thank God for him, too. He helped me not to fall apart, which would have been super embaressing, and he made me smile because he was honostly just looking for reassurance and someone to pour his story out to. It was a very productive heart to heart with God, thats what it was.

We then walked out into the night and there was a full moon and all these starts glistening like fairy dust. It was beautiful and the temperature was just below 60 with a soft breeze and the smell of rain. We went and got icecream as a reward for our cleansing and Caroline was happy to see that her card, which she thought had no money, got her and her brother some desert and fries. The guy behind the counter laughed at us when we celebrated the card not getting rejected. I was not embarssed, it was a funny thing to do. :)

I think that is all for now, though God knows I could ramble on about nothing for a long time.

Oh, wait, one more thing. The other day I babysat for Rachel and Brian again. This time I brought along a cake to bake for Mr. and Mrs.'s birthday. Rachel was much more kind and listened to me. We both sat down at the table and finished our hw together, she pratteling the entire time. It was nice. And then we baked the cake and she was having a grand ol' time putting it all together. I don't think she is allowed to do alot by herself. So I was happy that she did it almost all by herself, with me as the constant companion. And she was so proud when she figured out that she was going to hide it and it was going to be a surprise. She told me to tell Brian over and over agian that it was a surprise. So during his bath I drilled him. He just laughed at me and told me "shush, shush. Katie, it's a secret. Its a big secret." In his cute little raspy voice.

"yes, that's right Brian. Its a secret!" So I got him out of the tub and into his pjs, his hair all a mess and then his mom had just gotten home and he sprinted down the stairs screaming 'mom, mom, mom!' While, I saw it coming but I didn't have a quick enough reaction time. He flung himself onto his moms leg, still shouting her name.

"What is it, Brian?" Mrs. Staton.

"Happy Birthday, Mom! Hey guess what, mom, we made you a birthday cake. But shhh, its a surprise!"

Rachel was so mad.